Confused...

[Girl_18]

I really dunno what to think...

Am i Being Over paranoid???

Yesterday My so called BF...(Well, he's not really my BF...just my long term crush...but he treats me like his gf although he still says he's still not ready to commit...) He is a person that will not fuck around with girls...If u have read my stories from the adult discussions u will know what i mean...He's a very innocent Gentlemen like person that wont really go around fucking girls...

But yesterday I really damn paranoid!!! Around 3am i msged him to see if he was home already cos he told me he wanted to catch a late night movie with his secondary sch friends... I called him and he spoke damn soft like whispering like that...I asked him why he spoke so soft, he told me he was at a friends place and the others were asleep...just when i was about to ask him it was a guy or a girl, I heard a girl's voice! Cos i was sure he was always very honest, i just asked him directly and he said yah it was a girl...

So i asked him why was he at a girls place in the middle of the night...then he told me he was meeting a friend later @ 4am+...so this girl out of "good Will" asked him to come up to her place to rest first after they watched the movie and wait for time to pass...THen i heard again...the girl saying" Shui lai de? ( who is it) " in a very seductive tone...and after that she said "ni de ku zi yao fang na li" (where do u wanna put ur pants?)" Immediatly after that i heard him moan and he dropped the phone! and i knew something was wrong...

Then i dunno why i said the stupidest thing ever... since he not really my bf i got no right to question him all these things ma... so i just hung up... i was almost so sad just now ....really dunno what to say to him...Dunno whether they did anything after that...WHen he called back i just ignored him...and pressed busy...

Now i really confused did he really do it with her???I can guarantee you he is 100% damn innocent about sex this kind of things de...So sian now...havent call him back yet...already got 50 over miss calls liao...BUt also cant be he initiate de...i know him too well liao...he's not that kind of person...but i dunno about de ger since i don contact his sec sch friends...

[Big Sexy]

does it really matter?
he is not your bf..
you are in a relationship where you
don;t even know what your status is..
and if you really want to be his girl..
stop being paranoid and just pick up his call.
have a word with him and see what happen next..

Originally Posted by Girl_18

already got 50 over miss calls liao...BUt also cant be he initiate de...i know him too well liao....

[SureScore]

Originally Posted by Girl_18

I really dunno what to think...

Am i Being Over paranoid???

You are now a confused lady. If both of you love each other then have a heart to heart talk with him. Thrash it out and get it over with.

Any more doubts will make your life extremely miserable.

From what you had written, you really love him and he also love you after calling you 50 times but you don't want to pick up his call.

[MaMister]

maybe you think he is a gentleman but he is not... and he need to release...

[GeMiNiZzzzZzz]

Originally Posted by Girl_18

I really dunno what to think...

Am i Being Over paranoid???

Yesterday My so called BF...(Well, he's not really my BF...just my long term crush...but he treats me like his gf although he still says he's still not ready to commit...) ..

Oh cmon lady, i used to say this sentence to most of my "Gfs" about 10 years back in my teens.
1) Im not ready to commit
2) I just want a companion
3) I just want someone to listen & be my side when i need her..
goes on & on.

Now that you have make yourself so clear that it is just a crush - why do you care so much who he is with as you are not even clear what's your own status with him.

Im just guessing here - maybe you have rejected him someway in some intimate actions...which ended him up with......oh forget it..i dun wana make u more confused

p/s : never have the thinking a guy is Gentleman / nice / quiet - he will forever stay that way...a guy will change with the environment..just like me...看我72变...

[colins]

That guy is never yours and to be frank, you can only go so far with him. You are confused becos this is the first time he made you insecure and also the fact that he tried to contact you many times, probably to explain himself.

Face the issue, if he wants you as his gf, make him say so. If he doesn't, you got to move on. Otherwise this issue will cause you to get confused again and again. If you dun solve it, it only means you want it. You want to be one of his nameless gfs hanging around him chasing after false hope. If so, you have no right to complain about whoever he is, cos you already accepted his arrangement for you.

[hugs]

TS,
make the first move if u want him . meet up with him n tell him u want to make a different in the relationship . u want it to be more than just friend . u want him to be ur bf . and then tell him what u expect from him n what can he expect from u . show him how much that nite has hurt u . let him see ur feeling for him n then let him think it over . give him a chance to decide does he want the relationship to get any further .

rite now u dont own him but u have given him ur heart n all ur attention . and to him , u r the only girl who is most available now . but what if someday he meets another girl who is interested in him n she decides to tell him that first ? and what if he tells u that all these yrs he thot u r just a friend so he agrees to accept that girl as gf ?

just my 2-cent advice / advises (i am trying to give uncle sam a chance to scold me over my english )

[peanut123]

Great observation bro.

TS, I agree with colins. You are "just a friend". The fact that you have a crush on him does not change that. He might actually like you, but as long as you 2 are just friends, you cannot expect any commitment or loyalty from him. You have actually no right to interfere even if he's bonking every girl he meets. Either confirm your status, or drop him altogether.

Regarding your perception that he's "innocent", well girl, I have news for you : MEN ARE NEVER INNOCENT. As long as he has balls and dick, he wants to bonk girls. As you can tell in this forum, tat's what alot of men do, even if they are students, husbands, and boyfriends. That very innocent man you know may be a closet cheongster. Just look at the number of newbies in the forum, many of them probably "innocent" students and young men, asking for hookers' contacts. The fact that some girl is asking about his pants mean that his pants are off, and he probably bonked her.

Originally Posted by colins

That guy is never yours and to be frank, you can only go so far with him. You are confused becos this is the first time he made you insecure and also the fact that he tried to contact you many times, probably to explain himself.

Face the issue, if he wants you as his gf, make him say so. If he doesn't, you got to move on. Otherwise this issue will cause you to get confused again and again. If you dun solve it, it only means you want it. You want to be one of his nameless gfs hanging around him chasing after false hope. If so, you have no right to complain about whoever he is, cos you already accepted his arrangement for you.

[colins]

Originally Posted by hugs

TS,
make the first move if u want him . meet up with him n tell him u want to make a different in the relationship . u want it to be more than just friend . u want him to be ur bf . and then tell him what u expect from him n what can he expect from u . show him how much that nite has hurt u . let him see ur feeling for him n then let him think it over . give him a chance to decide does he want the relationship to get any further .

rite now u dont own him but u have given him ur heart n all ur attention . and to him , u r the only girl who is most available now . but what if someday he meets another girl who is interested in him n she decides to tell him that first ? and what if he tells u that all these yrs he thot u r just a friend so he agrees to accept that girl as gf ?

Hello sis, what you suggested in the first paragraph is to 'show-hand' to him. Firstly I think she already did that, therefore she is hanging on to his reply "he still says he's still not ready to commit". For such an important question, she sure remember the reply one. Secondly, a show-hand puts her to a very submissive position which 1. she is trying to maintain a less-than-submissive position by rejecting his 50over calls and 2. there won't be much change to the relationship anyway (if he agrees) cos he is using his non-commitment as a high ground now (means he need the high ground).

She is relating a recent situation, but if you read between the lines, this is a battle of who takes the lead in the relationship. He is non-committal, she finds it hard to maintain the relationship becos of this trump card. The only thing that is balancing the equation is that she believes he is not a flirt and therefore not likely to fuck around even if he is not committed to her. But after this event, the balance is shifted in such a way that she realised he could be fucking around and lying to her. She cannot take this shift and therefore it challenges her basic belief that he is pure and innocent. Just look at the number of times she is saying he is good, he is pure, he doesn't fool around. That only means that belief is now being challenged to an extend that she is collapsing into a heap of scraps. You dun have to repeat so many times if you belief it to be a FACT.

I agree the second paragraph though but I think she is not his only available girl. Most guys will only put a girl on hold becos there are other girls around. More to fuck is better than only one to fuck, I'm sure when TS says "he treats me like his gf", it means a sexual relationship.

[香香很烦]

moral of the story. 不要乱放裤子。

[fazer6s]

Sorry sis to be blunt here but given the details
Yes he was out to de-stress himself.
Deny all you want but you heard what u heard
there are no guarantees in life
Once again sorry for being straight up

[xyz1001]

Originally Posted by colins

Most guys will only put a girl on hold becos there are other girls around. More to fuck is better than only one to fuck, I'm sure when TS says "he treats me like his gf", it means a sexual relationship.

Agreed. TS is just another fish in his pond. There are other fishes which he is obviously more interested in. This is a very ideal situation for him coz he can treat TS like a gf, do things what normal couples do and yet no commitment needed. Meantime he can continue to drop his pants elsewhere...

TS, if this man loves u, he would have ask you to be his gf.

Originally Posted by Girl_18

...but he treats me like his gf although he still says he's still not ready to commit...

Sounds like "we already do so many (sexual) things together, he still says he's still not ready...

[colins]

Originally Posted by xyz1001

Agreed. TS is just another fish in his pond. There are other fishes which he is obviously more interested in. This is a very ideal situation for him coz he can treat TS like a gf, do things what normal couples do and yet no commitment needed. Meantime he can continue to drop his pants elsewhere...

And where have you been, my dear friend??

[SourSoap]

Dont think !

Just ans his call and ask wat happen.


But be prepare la..

there can only be two ans "have" or "dont have"



Cheer up~

[peanuts100k]

my advice to u...do not trust a person by his appearance.you claim that he is innocent when it comes to sex,but who can know what is he thinking of and what is his motive?I believe many samsters here to their wives or galfriend seems like a good or perfect husbands.But these poor little girl don't even know that they have a sammyboy account to begin with