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-   -   Divorceed fall in to share your sob story (https://thesbf.shop/showthread.php?t=786367)

laobiantai 18-08-2020 01:34 AM

Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
share why you divorced. Who gets custody of kids.

How much assets and monthly payments do you need to give to your ex wife

pearlnjewel 18-08-2020 12:00 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
Bro you can share your story first?

Single here afraid of getting married. Maybe you have some lessons for us to learn. The irony is there is also no girls want to marry me now ^^

laobiantai 18-08-2020 02:27 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by pearlnjewel (Post 20163565)
Bro you can share your story first?

Single here afraid of getting married. Maybe you have some lessons for us to learn. The irony is there is also no girls want to marry me now ^^

I am still single n trying to find a gf

hoosdathu 18-08-2020 03:38 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
bro TS in the midst of a divorce ah?

fallen11 21-08-2020 10:09 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by laobiantai (Post 20162880)
share why you divorced. Who gets custody of kids.

How much assets and monthly payments do you need to give to your ex wife

ya share your story first.
then we share ours.
most people here wont laugh at you as we have our own experience before, probably similar to yours.
take it as a divorce support group :)

Hotfuzz 24-08-2020 09:02 AM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
In my 40s and in the process of getting a divorce, I'm in the US.
I get most of the child, 80% of the custody.
Will probably pay alimony of about USD 1.3k a month.
She will probably get about USD400k lumpsum after I buy out her portion of our house, split stocks.

My soon-to-be-ex, is a spendthrift, bad tempered, not-family minded and has no respect for me and my family, even though I make 3X her salary and treat her and her family with respect and pay for 90% of the household expenses, including vacations etc. So, I am done. There is no sob story, it's just life.

Only the weak minded and ones lacking in self confidence will dwell in the past. If you need to divorce, you should do it and not worry. Life is too short to live with somebody that you cannot stand. This is my second divorce, and my life had improved on many fronts since my first divorce, except for my second marriage. The only good thing that came out of my second marriage is my kid.

peeboy75 24-08-2020 10:24 AM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Hotfuzz (Post 20175316)
In my 40s and in the process of getting a divorce, I'm in the US.
I get most of the child, 80% of the custody.
Will probably pay alimony of about USD 1.3k a month.
She will probably get about USD400k lumpsum after I buy out her portion of our house, split stocks.

My soon-to-be-ex, is a spendthrift, bad tempered, not-family minded and has no respect for me and my family, even though I make 3X her salary and treat her and her family with respect and pay for 90% of the household expenses, including vacations etc. So, I am done. There is no sob story, it's just life.

Only the weak minded and ones lacking in self confidence will dwell in the past. If you need to divorce, you should do it and not worry. Life is too short to live with somebody that you cannot stand. This is my second divorce, and my life had improved on many fronts since my first divorce, except for my second marriage. The only good thing that came out of my second marriage is my kid.

With all due respect bro, i think your thinking is healthy in a way, but i think you should think objectively about why your marriages turn out this way twice already..
1. Are you attracting the wrong type of lady?
2. Are you attracted to the wrong type of lady?
3. Maybe marriage just isnt for me..
I agree that dwelling in the past is unhealthy, but we still need to objectively think about where we fall short and what we can improve on to make future things better..

Hotfuzz 24-08-2020 03:46 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by peeboy75 (Post 20175430)
With all due respect bro, i think your thinking is healthy in a way, but i think you should think objectively about why your marriages turn out this way twice already..
1. Are you attracting the wrong type of lady?
2. Are you attracted to the wrong type of lady?
3. Maybe marriage just isnt for me..
I agree that dwelling in the past is unhealthy, but we still need to objectively think about where we fall short and what we can improve on to make future things better..

Oh yeah I know very well why both my marriages failed. Different lessons to be learned. One word of advice to men is to look for red flags that women seek to have control over you.

I missed those flags in my second marriage or she hid it well, but then after the marriage and kid, over the last 6 years, she started trying to squeeze me on multiple fronts, thinking that I would relent and give up. I will not shrivel and die like other men who think it's the end of the world if they got a divorce, or think about the kid to stay in an unhappy marriage. To her, it is a game of control, thinking that the law protects women in divorces and I would be scared of her. So I told her I wanted a divorce, was adamant about it and she tried to say sorry and shit. No way Jose.

popeye21 01-09-2020 09:38 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
was together with my ex wife since 2005. gt married in 2013. divorced in jan 2019. finalised divorce in feb 2020 ( finalised meaning the matrimonial asset and all finalised). according to muslim law. have 3 kids. i divorce when she is preg.

story:

during engage forst few mnths after found out gt credit card debt. first it was onli 1. to summarise she is not truthful.gt like 6 cards, license moneylender, buy jewellry on loan and also borrow from werk. stupid to help he pay up. since we are engaged. i told her its a loan. and help pay up monthly. m earning more then her.

after marriage, still servicing her loan and after 1 yr plus to 2 yrs settled. i thought finished. den i found out still have summore debt.

debt b4 marriage can say her lifestyle. but after marriage don see her buy expensive things. bills all i pay, car, groceries and everyting. paid her hp bills and all. end up per mnth m left few hundreds.

final straw came in 2018 wen i found out another 4 credit cards plus personal loan. i have applied for part time uni. need to save money for school fees. ask her eats d loan for. deny n deny.and den i shw her the credit card receipt. cannot run.she turn story say spend on family.ask her show credit card statement n receipt, credit bureau report she refuse. i had d last straw. we file for divorce. money gone and not accountable. like drbt is ard 30k at least.

popeye21 01-09-2020 09:47 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
continuation:

file for divorce is the start of the heart ache. she file numerous poloce report. don allow me.to see my sons, don allow me inside the house. eventhough no court order as still in process with the court. police come also cannot do anything. she did the most nasty thing. lock the gate. forst few times i cut the lock and call padlock.but after sometime i cant be bothered. cos wen we fight my kids cry n are in shock. i gave in. she set rule saying i can see few hrs onli every week wen no court order also.

i was shock wen she gt a lawyer for the divorce. as much as i don wanna waste money i engage a lawyer too. she is confident that she wanna squeeze money from me in d divorce and borrowed her parents. she demanded the following:

1) half of the car sales proceed (which she did not pay)

2) 10% of my cpf and also a portion of my savings.

3) 70% or the house proceed.

4) in muslim law pay a lump sum to the ex wife. calculated by min $5 times how many days of marriage and 3months allowance which range from min $500 per mnth to donno hw much max)

6) she also request i cam onli see the kids 2 hrs every week

conclusion:

she gt none wat she wanted. all my money she gt none. even sales from car. she was paid minum allimony. 1 off payment.house equal share and kids every 2 weeks dry can sleep over fri to sun

she gt wat she deserve. karma hits her

hokkienme56 02-09-2020 05:52 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by popeye21 (Post 20191915)
continuation:

file for divorce is the start of the heart ache. she file numerous poloce report. don allow me.to see my sons, don allow me inside the house. eventhough no court order as still in process with the court. police come also cannot do anything. she did the most nasty thing. lock the gate. forst few times i cut the lock and call padlock.but after sometime i cant be bothered. cos wen we fight my kids cry n are in shock. i gave in. she set rule saying i can see few hrs onli every week wen no court order also.

i was shock wen she gt a lawyer for the divorce. as much as i don wanna waste money i engage a lawyer too. she is confident that she wanna squeeze money from me in d divorce and borrowed her parents. she demanded the following:

1) half of the car sales proceed (which she did not pay)

2) 10% of my cpf and also a portion of my savings.

3) 70% or the house proceed.

4) in muslim law pay a lump sum to the ex wife. calculated by min $5 times how many days of marriage and 3months allowance which range from min $500 per mnth to donno hw much max)

6) she also request i cam onli see the kids 2 hrs every week

conclusion:

she gt none wat she wanted. all my money she gt none. even sales from car. she was paid minum allimony. 1 off payment.house equal share and kids every 2 weeks dry can sleep over fri to sun

she gt wat she deserve. karma hits her

luckily u got urself out of tat mess, if not who know if u continue this marriage wat other secret and worst thing she might do. glad u got out of the marriage and could donnid pay her such ridiculos requests she asking

popeye21 03-09-2020 02:34 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
ya i think hard abt it. no use be with a burden. she gt debt donno spend on wat den the fmily suffers. now i pay maintenance for my sons.

JacqueMerlin 03-09-2020 03:34 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
Married ex wife after whirlwind romance. Found that she slept behind my back at the end of the first year. No evidence kept but i saw her messages. And she can get so creative with her excuses for her infidelity. She got dumped and demanded maintenance from me in order to stop me from divorcing. Caught her many times more with affairs but always threatens me with the women's charter until i almost wanted to commit suicide. Met someone who introduced me to SBF and i began my revenge cheating. Eventually She found a french or Belgium guy can't remember wherever it was and she was in a rush to divorce ended up agreeing to a lesser divorce settlement. I lost a lot of money and my savings went dry to pay her a lump sum so that she won't ask for maintenance.

She got dumped and came back demanding me to remarry her otherwise she will destroy me with the women's charter. I deleted and blocked her and called the police on her when she went to harass my mother. Crazy self entitled Singaporean woman.

laobiantai 03-09-2020 04:59 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Hotfuzz (Post 20175316)
In my 40s and in the process of getting a divorce, I'm in the US.
I get most of the child, 80% of the custody.
Will probably pay alimony of about USD 1.3k a month.
She will probably get about USD400k lumpsum after I buy out her portion of our house, split stocks.

My soon-to-be-ex, is a spendthrift, bad tempered, not-family minded and has no respect for me and my family, even though I make 3X her salary and treat her and her family with respect and pay for 90% of the household expenses, including vacations etc. So, I am done. There is no sob story, it's just life.

Only the weak minded and ones lacking in self confidence will dwell in the past. If you need to divorce, you should do it and not worry. Life is too short to live with somebody that you cannot stand. This is my second divorce, and my life had improved on many fronts since my first divorce, except for my second marriage. The only good thing that came out of my second marriage is my kid.

What did you like about her when you marry her?

She very chio? Give you good sex?

laobiantai 03-09-2020 05:00 PM

Re: Divorceed fall in to share your sob story
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by popeye21 (Post 20191899)
was together with my ex wife since 2005. gt married in 2013. divorced in jan 2019. finalised divorce in feb 2020 ( finalised meaning the matrimonial asset and all finalised). according to muslim law. have 3 kids. i divorce when she is preg.

story:

during engage forst few mnths after found out gt credit card debt. first it was onli 1. to summarise she is not truthful.gt like 6 cards, license moneylender, buy jewellry on loan and also borrow from werk. stupid to help he pay up. since we are engaged. i told her its a loan. and help pay up monthly. m earning more then her.

after marriage, still servicing her loan and after 1 yr plus to 2 yrs settled. i thought finished. den i found out still have summore debt.

debt b4 marriage can say her lifestyle. but after marriage don see her buy expensive things. bills all i pay, car, groceries and everyting. paid her hp bills and all. end up per mnth m left few hundreds.

final straw came in 2018 wen i found out another 4 credit cards plus personal loan. i have applied for part time uni. need to save money for school fees. ask her eats d loan for. deny n deny.and den i shw her the credit card receipt. cannot run.she turn story say spend on family.ask her show credit card statement n receipt, credit bureau report she refuse. i had d last straw. we file for divorce. money gone and not accountable. like drbt is ard 30k at least.

What did you like about her before you marry her?

She is very chio? Give you good sex? Or what?


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